2nd week of study life had gone. I really enjoy myself for the week. These few days, I slept a lot. Don't know why. I also went to have sushi with my friends. And we get to know who is the sushi queen, definitely is not me. After dealing with all the bacterias, they are so interested to have Salmonella instead of Salmon sushi. Oh my goodness..
I gave my little angel a special drink, which he thinks that he wont drink it anyway. Nevermind, just keep it and appreciate it.
Last night, I had been dreaming of him for the whole night. The happiness that we gone through, I really miss it. Eventhough the time is really short, but at least we loved each other with true heart. I'm now away from you, but the heart of missing is still there. I had tried to forget you, but I failed. What should I do?
Little Prince is still there to support me. Should I give him another chance? Will he appreciate more than ever? What should I do? I don't want to think so much. Just let God decide it for be. I believe that there's an answer in Him.
Just pray.
Build up your spiritual growth with Him. Remain faith in Him.
Great days...
A message for myself...
Yvonne,
God is guiding your way in front of you no matter how dark the path is.
God is strengthening your heart no matter how tough the life is.
God is making a way for you no matter what problems are you facing.
God had let so many guys to be surrounding you. However, you had let go the right one and chosen the wrong one. You should have giving chances for someone who are really putting efforts on you. You know who are them. And you are regretting for not giving them chances. You were attracted by the sweet words and go for the wrong one. You shouldn't do that. Wake up, Yvonne! Open your eyes and try to know him more next time before you are giving him chance! Don't go for a wrong man!
Now, it's not the right time for you to worry about your little prince. God will provide the best little prince for you. If a man is not suiting you at all, God won't let him to come to you. God will lead a best guy to come into your life. Just wait. Be patient. Just surrender everything to God. God will always be there to listen to your prayers.
Pray hard and trust in the LORD always!
A sad day...a msg for him...
Once again, my mind is messy. I don't know why should I do this. What is TRUE LOVE actually? What does LOVE means? What is LOVE?
Sad memories keep flashing through my mind. I couldn't convince myself to forgive him. I tried so hard, but still I can't. I'm trying to give up but I can't. Maybe it's not the right time, and not the right man.
Loneliness never comes to me since I'm away. I knew that God will always be with me, and my family will always supporting me. Nevertheless, friends around me are always there to support me. My cg members will always care and protect me as well. Thank God for all these. I really really appreciate that!
I'm still waiting. But, how long should I wait for? I just want a confirmation from him, a strong prove from him. Maybe it takes time. So, I should give him some time. I'm indeed exhausted in love. I don't want a love that is unstable, that lies on rumours, and cheatings.
How much do I love him? Why should I keep on forgiving him and keep on receiving hurts? Why? Why should I do like this? It's the worst way to change him. NO! I'm unable to change him. ONLY he himself can change himself. I should let go. Let him to have freedom. Let him to go for what he loves, who he really loves.
Every recovery never stands for 3 months. Before reaching 100 days, everything will be gone. He will go back to his previous mistakes. And I'm receiving the same hurts. Does he really know this? Does he really care my feelings? Does he really sincere to me? If do so, he shouldn't have hurt me once and once. I'm sad.
My final hope and wish is to see him happiness. I think everyone wish to see that he is happiness eventhough he had hurt few girls including me. I hope that God can change his life. I hope that he can realise what he is doing. I hope that he won't hurt me anymore. I hope that I can see a new him.
First day of class reopen...
Before the laziness gone, I had to be alert now! Don't be lazy anymore!
So much comments from my coursemates after my long hair got cut. Some people said that I looked more mature. Thanks! I just cut my hair in order to start a new life. I never sad of cutting off my long shiny black hair. One of my friends said that previously my hair looked black and shiny but now, short and brown. Anyway, really need more cares on my hair as well. Also, some saying that I get thinner, some saying that I get fatter. I also don't know how it happens. Thin + fat = unchanged! Right?
Today also went shopping with girls. Different girls, different tastes, different comments. Anyway, I really enjoyed it!
A New Day...
Stepping into a new day, the first day of July, I'm leaving to a place for my study. In the airport, I was able to met with lots of friends from my secondary school. Besides, I also met with an important man, a future lawyer, who was my assistant monitor of my previous choir group. He is still unchange, talkative and like to sing.
This new day, I'm sure that God was looking after me. Everything gets fine as I reached here. I'm indeed tiring. But yet I still have to prepare myself to start a new life, new study life. God is good to me. Thank God for letting me to pass all my papers.
This night, I realized that my mind, my thinkings had changed my heart. I received his apology. However, I still couldn't be able to accept him. I need proves by actions. I need them so much to stabilized my trust in him. Please show them to me with your sincerity. I hope that he can change within this two years. I had done part of my job, just because of him, or if not, my future guy.
Anyway, thank God for strengthening my heart during all unhappy moments. I had learnt to be more open-minded. Things go and happen from time to time. Just surrender everything to God. God will make a way for you. Trust in the Lord! Pray hard..
